I owe you an apology. I disappeared for a few months.

It began when my I took a picture of my son Dreamer, age 10, and he said: “please don’t post that on Twitter.”

PLOP

I had thought about this before, but not very much. What privacy does my child deserve? What is, and is not, up to me to disclose about him? When they were younger, everything was game. But my sons are growing up to be individuals with their own thoughts and opinions. I want that. I encourage that. So I therefore must respect THAT.

Then came the end of Ironman Lake Placid. I had absolutely no motivation to train for anything. I wanted to be “normal” when it came to my fitness. I didn’t want to be constantly pushing my limits and missing family movie nights because I had to get to bed early. I was done training and had nothing to write about.

Or so I thought.

It feels as if I am going through life jumping from project to project. Ideas come up, I get excited, and float away with them. It feels erratic and disjointed. But when I look back at the path I’ve taken … amazingly I see fluidity. One project leads me to the next. There is a natural progression of how I change and grow even if I can’t see it while it is going on.

One path.

If I pay attention to the story of my life, I know what makes me happy. I love working on social causes. I always have, as you can see from this video from Voxxi when I received the 3M Positive Impact Award. But even from the start of this blog a few years ago, I’ve gone from social cause to social cause. It started with bike safety as I was training for an Ironman and terrified of riding my bike. Then I decided to fundraise during Ironman Florida for the National Parkinson Foundation in honor of my father who has battled this disease for the last twelve years. At that race, I was inspired by a blind woman and came back to Miami determined to help someone through a finish line. I had no idea what I was getting into, nor how things would go, when I asked my quadriplegic friend Kerry to race the South Beach Triathlon in 2014. As I continued to race with what eventually became known as ThumbsUp, I realized Kerry is a much better spokesperson for that cause than I will ever be. I fundraised for Brianna, an eight year old girl in my sons class who eventually lost her battle waiting for a heart transplant. I moved on to work with children. I was a teacher, I have kids, and I began an incredible project of working with homeless children living in transitional housing. We started a run club, and then some. As that project came to a close at the end of the summer of 2015, I missed it and knew I tapped into something. I then started a Run Club at my children’s school and THAT has taken a life of it’s own.

I felt like there were so many other things going on that I wanted to write about instead of my own fitness journey. In fact, I was a little tired of writing about myself and my training.

I was getting tired of selfies too.

So instead of changing things around, I just stopped. Cold turkey. And left anyone who was following me hanging.

I am sorry.

I am not done. Not by a long shot. I am learning so much about empowering children, the power of positivity, and the importance of raising children who believe in their own abilities. I have also become much more politically engaged. The more I follow the issues I am most concerned with, the more I firmly believe we need a shot of positivity. There is so much terror and sadness out there I am sometimes overwhelmed with the news. But there is so much light that can guide us. I want to focus on that light.

So though I say TriathlonMami 2.0 is about to get started, if I look back at the posts I’ve written over the years, TriathlonMami is just growing up and I won’t grow up in radio silence.  I hope we can be friends again.