I know this pandemic has been hard on so many people, and I am also aware that not all of us are experiencing it the same way. I do NOT mean to be insensitive to anyone’s hardships and am very well aware that my viewpoint is a rather privileged one. 

So, this goes out to those of you who are kind of dreading (sometimes secretly) that things are opening up. Because I cannot believe that I am the only one feeling like this, even though it seems everyone is clamoring for life to get back to normal.

That truth comes riddled with guilt, feeling as if maybe I’m selfish for thinking that. I mean, my 8^th grader didn’t have graduation or time to say goodbye to his friends, my boys worked all winter towards qualifying for the national snowboarding championship which was cancelled, and their summer camp … the highlight of their year, will not be happening either. 

So how can I be grateful for “the big pause” when my own kids, and so many others, obviously were so adversely impacted by it?

Ahh… the million dollar question.

Here’s the thing though … you can be grateful AND sad about how it has affected some people at the same time.

I can have empathy for my kids and their feelings, and honor what my heart is whispering too.

During this time of lockdown …

• My kids became even closer than they were before as they only had each other for physical company
• They are musicians and wrote songs and are ready to record their first album
• We planted a family garden
• We spend way more time together (with teenage boys I know how that is fleeting)
• We saved THOUSANDS of dollars on crap we used to purchase but really have no need to.
• I have peaceful mornings as my kids wake up at noon!

And on, and on.

So it’s okay if you feel a little nervous about “re-opening.” It’s okay if your life was good while it seemed like the rest of the world was going to shit. 

There, I said it. Phew.

Now that I did, I can look forward. To what the “new normal” is because I recognized what had been weighing in my heart for a few days. And just as I grieved for the world when this all first started, I grieve this sense that this moment with my sons is passing.

Life is like that: a collection of moments. When the dreadful ones come, you can rest assured that there will be better times. And when things are good, you best pay attention and enjoy it … because that too shall pass.